Julie and Jim

so now i gotta write this fast cuz i promised my friend i would go to the beach and its nice and not be all locked in like a old woman.  but we had another movie night the other night- my mom and boyfriend and i invited Stephanie but she text and said she had to go to work last minute whatever.  good cuz my mom picked the movie i think to impress her new friend like shes all cultured and shit walking around in french pajamas vu lay vu and black mascara.  but she watches So you think you can Dance and eats doritors and we all know the truth.  but i didn’t say anything bc that would be mean in front of her friend i’ll just tell her later.  and him with his dirty beard and frowns all the time what a hairy cuntmuffin.  but it was ok the movie turned out not that bad after it took forever to get used to reading the words on the bottom of screen and the black and white.

I like the part where I thought wtf what a brassy bitch (in a good way) when she basically told all the guys what was going down like it wasn’t nothing.  I always thought it was slutyy and am i being slutty? but then i see it doesn’t always have to mean that maybe you just want to do stuff and have fun.

crap crap only 3 minutes left to talk about it before I forget hmmmm  idk it was a lot and i like how she got to dress up like a man and say whatever she felt or thought.  i try to be like that when i talk and will be more now too that i know even old women did it and its not so bad to be free

that’s all i got ran out of time but i wanna say again what a boss bitch except for the end.  so watching it with fam made me feel a little better less angry and everythings ok i know it





Pissing on myselfie don’t get raped in texas

i was about to write about trump again and this article came up and i was like woe wtf.  wtf is this shit and how did it feel to after all that to have walk around and not just go to sleep like you want to.  so dont get raped in texas stacy they do not give two fucks to rub together or to put in buckets. http://www.cosmopolitan.com/politics/a58941/dinisha-ball-rape-kit-texas-emergency-room/?src=longreads

but i guess that goes with trump when you ghink about it bc he doesn’t give two or three fucks in general.  especially about black people or women or anyone really other than the guy looking back in the mirror.  my new teacher asks what value he contributes to our being and i thought wtf are you smoking.  she was not smoking tho and i was sitting there thinking about pissing on trump like GOLDENLY ha!   I was like what if he fell down a well on some kind of abandened countryside and i walked by and could hear like Hellooooooo help me.  I would go over and see him down there in the murk and hed be like stacy help me and i’d be like ok and take big nasty piss down his well.  hot.  sizzly when it hit the side and watered down

i wanted to say this in class but thought that it was a bad idea and wouldnt contribute to the conversation like she said we should.  then i thought what if i helped him for a long time and he had to just drink my pee a lo and that’s how he survived.  but if he’s some deep down part of all us like my teacher said i thought oh i am pissing on myself fuck.  whatever i still would do it i think and i might feel bad at first but then i would think about all the people he wants to kill or make hungry waterboard and i would scream down the hole, “Hey man I AM HELPING YOU” bc technically i am its just the deleivery.  nobody wants to drink pee idt and if they do thats just funny but whatever

i started thinking about people trapped in places after that and what i told my doctor about the numbers when think about who could be trapped in a basement somewhere like a prisoner.  like you know it happens and if it does then prob a least one or two in your town and then that’s weird.  last year i thought one was close to my house like at night i could hear her thoughts or something like that and she was like help me.  but i know that it is a FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION and you can’t hear peoples thoughts or they cant put them to you.  my doctor said its ok to journal about it and i said fuck you and your’re cunty journal and he just squinting his eyes real close and opened some drawers.  i knew he was writing more about me but i didn’t care that day bc i felt bad for the woman even tho she wasn’t real.  that shit would suck so bad to be stuck down there and cant leave and i would bit his fucking dick off no matter if he shoot me


Fuck Medication and My Haunted Little Sister

We’ll I’m really not saying fuck my sister that’s why putting words in the right place is important like playing by the rules or least acting like it LOL. Guess a better title will be Fuck Medication and Why I’m not afraid of Haunted Little Sister.  My fucking dum ass english teacher would like that.  LOLOL.  Oh she hates the LOL btw, she aid it doesn’t go in any book report or even daily dialogues.  I found her on facebook and almost DMed her a whole fucking page of LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLLOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLO LOLOO OOLOLOLO LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO LOLOLOLOLOLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLLOLOLOLOOO

but I’m sure she woulda got her big ass pannies in a bunch and wouldn’t even pullthem out like walk around all day with your pannies in your ass and rubbing up against your hole and all itchy and too gaddam afraid to pull them out bc OH WHAT WOULD OTHER PEIOPLE THINK ABOUT MY HAND NEAR <MY ASS!  Lolololololol.  That made me laugh. Glad she doesn’t know abt my blog or my mom, anyone really, I can say what I want.  Anyway atm I am sitting her thinking about medication and how the docter tried to put me on PROZAC and another one I forgot bc I said fucck everything too many times I guess.

I did n’t want to do it but my mom was like come on baby give it a go or some dum encouraged shit like that and I did it.  For about a month I guess and the doc said it takes even two weeks to get in your system but I don’t beleive him how could he know hes not in my system.  Then I met an old lady on the street who said her dog was on it to and apperently most dogs nowadays are and they give the the SAME pills as humans lol.  That’s funny.  Or cunty if you think about it too hard wich is what I did for a while and I got mad again and saID FUCKKKKK YOOOOOOO MEDIIIIICATTTTIONN and tried to feed it to some squirrels.  They didn’t buy cuz they were probably some smart ass squirrells who needed to get there nuts and know it wouldn’t be a man walking around handin nuts out at the end of the day like we all do with a paycheck.  Ok so thats most of the fuck meditation story theres more but I gotta go in a minute and I wanted to write this bc I wasn’t even writing much when I was strung out I was just staring at the grass and counting sheep and shit. Like that prozac dog waking down the street swaying my ass. Oh look at stacyyyyy so serene she ‘s doing so good but really

I wasn’t doing so good and I was still seeing stuff in my doorway. at night the most of the timed.  During the day I never saw people in the bushes or nothing but if I was tired or not paying attntion I would see stuff in the corne of my eye and like going by real fast but I think that happens to everybody if they notice or just don’t’ think about it.  But at night falling asleep I always stare at my doorway and sometime I get weird but I try not to.  I get so sleepy and I leave the lamp on but when my eyes are falling asleep or they flit open sometimes over and over I can see stuff moving around and it FREAKS ME THE FUCK OUT.  I gotta deal with it tho cuz I gotta sleep and I aint no punk 9mm scared ass ho nonruthless.  I think a gun would be a bad idead tho.  How you shoot a ghost? You don’t.  you just deal with it and not be a punk bitch.

plus I don’t like saying ghost I’m not saying that ijs it’s some weird stuff and its in my brain or in this house.  Whatever.  Anyway I can only sleep on my right side and I want to sleep on my left side but then I would be facing the wall with my back to the room and the door wich I think is a dum idea,  I’m not saying I’m scared bc if I was scared I wouldn’t go to sleep but something says just to keep your line sight this way just so you know.  And THEN the other night my haunted ass little sister did some more weird shit.  I remember when one of my moms ex boyfriend would sleep over sometimes and one time I woke up and went downstairs and he was sitting there in the couch staring off into  space.  And I said Nico wtf? And fhe didn’t respond he just sit there kinda zombie like.  I kept walking down the stairs and said Nico Nico and finally he said whaa? Like he was still kinda asleep and I figured later he was sleepwalking or something right?  I said whatcha doing down here? (middle of the night!) and he just kept saying what like he didn’t understand my question.

He did it a few more times too and it got too creepy and I told my mom like with the lost look in his eye and it is SUPER FUCKING WEIRD to talk to somebody when their like that.  And then I go to sleep thinking what is he doing and when will he wake up? My fucking mom said “oh Staaacy, you’re so funny, nico just gets real tired from working construction and gets all out of it, NOT a big deal, he’s fine.

It’s not fine mom.  It’s not fine.  This nico ho unpimpish lesson one- don’t be creepin at night- lesson 2 you might get popped spliffed. THEN I watched part of a movie called AMiytville horror on netflix and had to turn it off when that man kept wandering around with his dum ass beard and dog.  FUCK that shit.  I m glad she broke up with him.

So then damn this is long but I’m almost done.  Last night my little sister kinda did the same thing and unforchinately we can’t break up with her.  I was sleep and then I opened my eyes and RIGHT when I opened my eyes she was there coming from a weird direction in my doorway walking toward me slowly almost like her feet weren’t moving up down and it was a glide. But it was strange too SHE JUST APPEARED THERE like she didn’t really come from that direction either somehow idk.  This weird look on her face and wide eyes and tear marks lines on her face.  She just said STaaacy….. stacy and I jumped up and put my hand out in front of me like a football player but I didn’t’ want to scare here either bc that’s my sister anyway.  I said ok come here and she did I grabbed her shoulders said what’s wrong, what’s wrong and she said idk.

Then she said “nobody likes me they don’t like me, nobody likes me” and I was like who? I said why you come from that direction bc her room was the other way and she didnt answer.  I said Where were you!? Where were you and she said idk.  “Did you go downstairs?  And she said yeah she was looking for me but idk if thats true.  I can’t  figure out why I opened my eyes right when she kinda appeared in my doorway and then I just told her to get in bed with me anyway.  So she kicked me all night naturaly and now I’m so sleepy and gotta go meet my new bf at the mall at 1.  Nice.